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New AI Rescues Readers from AI-Generated Blather

Circular Crap, Corp. (CCC) has proudly announced their first product – the Twaddle Filter v1 (TF1). It is designed specifically to filter out AI-Generated Blather.

CCC’s CEO, Hannah Iyiki, sat down with F$JNews to explains the origin and purpose of their unique product. “I was reading LinkedIn on the can one day and I found myself wondering just how much of my feed was AI-generated regurgitated pap created by so-called ‘content creators’ trying to reach quotas of useless production for marketing purposes. The fact was, I couldn’t really tell. 99% of what I read seemed to have no actual creative work behind it. And when I looked at comments on my own content, I began to wonder just how many empty relationships I was forming on the basis of pure drivel.”

Circular Vortex of Drivel
Circular Vortex of Drivel

At the time, Hannah Iyiki was serving as a Development Manager for TalkityTalk, an AI-content generator. What followed was a significant investment and changing of direction for her company. 

“We needed something to plow through the blather and find the real jewels in online content. As AIs – and most humans – just repeat and recombine what they’ve read elsewhere we needed something that could identify and isolate those pieces that stood out from the norm.”

CCC’s engineers thought AI would be perfect for the task. They developed an extensive and proprietary training course that they believed would teach their AI to distinguish novel human content from its AI and marketer-generated simulacrums. CCC engineers identified actual novel content over time and exposed both that and the echoes of that content in other writing to the AI. The AI was informed about which was original and which was simply regurgitation. Sadly, all the AI learned to do was pick out writings that predated 1977.

“To solve the problem, we ended up turning AI on its head. Rather than using pattern recognition to find what was novel, the AI was taught to ask a simple question: ‘could I write this?’ The more likely the answer was ‘yes’, the more likely it was reading claptrap.”

Today, this is what TF1 does. You can install it on any browser and it simply grays out all the tripe that comes up on your feed. You’re left with an informative and uplifting browsing experience. The only side effects seen so far as finger callouses from the excessive scrolling necessary to find non-grayed out areas. Particularly on LinkedIn.

At this point, the product is in the hands of the marketeers. There, CCCs plans are almost entirely conventional.

“We’ll market TF1 the same way as everybody else. We’ll just churn out AI-generated content to sound like we’re saying something important and useful – or weighing in on others so-called ‘valuable contributions’. But at the end of each piece, we’ll ask a question: do you feel like you just wasted your time and learned nothing? Then, we’ll hit them with the pitch.”

It seems like a powerful proposition but when contacted, executives at Netflix, Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok all dismissed the threat posed by TF1.

As Mack Macintyre, marketing manager at The Gurge, put it, “People really seem to like consuming meaningless piffle.”

If so, then maybe humankind is destined to be locked into a cycle of endless regurgitation. ‘Circular Crap’, indeed.

This report was not composed by AI. AI sucks at humor. If you’d like to highlight your business with real content that makes readers actually think, just reach out. We hope this business model works and we aren’t all destined for the water treatment plant of intellectual stimulation.

One more thing! We’ve got a special startup deal where you pay only to advertise your own post and we’ll write it for you.

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